All the times I was alone and scared

I wanted to write you all a story of all the corners my brain cut and all the ways I danced with myself in the dark
And then I wanted you to sing me a song that harmonized with the winds of my words
I wanted to tell you the scariest things in the most beautiful ways
so that you would forget that when my guts spill out on the table you will remember my humanness over my reflections
But I can’t cut corners and you can’t write music
And even if I did and you could
It always came back to one point
Remember when I told you how I dreamed and imagined
Except you don’t remember and this time I didn’t imagine
So write me a song about the rhythms that rock my soul to sleep
And then rock my soul to sleep
Tell me about the spilling of guts on the floor that reflects all of the decisions I never made
And then I’ll tell you about my darkest secrets that I kept under my pillow and sung to myself like the song I made while swimming